Bic Biro … View to a Quill … final annoying bit where the loose ends are all too conveniently tied up.

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He heard a voice. It was the voice of an angel calling out to him.

Are you going to lie there all day then ?

 It was Pen Fatale. Chief Mad Scientist Vlad was standing behind her. He threw off the power switch and the Death Pen Laser stopped. Bic lay there with a puzzled expression on his biro face.

But Le Quille said he’d locked you up in a cell and yet here you are NOT locked up in a cell. I don’t understand.

Vlad came and released me.

Why on earth would he do that!

Because … HE’S MY FATHER!!

YOUR FATHER!!!!!!!!!!

YES, MY FATHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YOU MEAN YOUR MOTHER ACTUALLY WENT AND HAD SEX WITH THIS UGLY FREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I WAS ADOPTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Vlad was starting to get decidedly agitated. He and Pen Fatale quickly undid the straps that held  Bic down and he was free. Vlad threw the power switch again and turned the Death Pen Laser back on after making a few minor adjustments.

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The power is now switched to absolute maximum danger level. That’s SELF DESTRUCT.  In five minutes this whole place is going to blow to kingdom come and us with it if we don’t hurry. We have to get out of here now.

Bic Biro looked at his watch and set it for 5 minutes. They had time to get away but it would be cutting it fine …

Not so fast my friends!

Le Quille’s figure stood menacingly in the doorway.

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LE QUILLE!!!

Yes, I think we’ve already established that.

But what are you doing back here ? We were just about to make good our escape. You really should try sticking to the script like we agreed.

Sorry. It’s just that it seems we are the recipient of an award. Look! 

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Is there a prize?

No, the award IS the prize.

Not even a bottle of wine!

No.

Well, an award is an award I suppose. And as chief cast member I really feel it’s up to me to give an acceptance speech on behalf of us all. I am proud and humbled to have received this fine award.  I would like to first thank the stationery department at MI6 for allowing me to appear in this production. Also my grateful thanks go to Fluffy the Kitten without whom none of this would have been possible. Last but not least … my undying gratitude goes to my fellow cast members whose efforts to make me look really fab on screen have not gone unnoticed. This goes especially to my leading lady, Pen Fatale. There’s a cheque in the post guys. Oh … and PorterGirl, if you happen to read this … thank you. I think you know what I’m talking about, baby!!!

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Oh well. Back to the plot.

Bic Biro looked at his watch. A look of slight annoyance momentarily clouded his usually sunny features. He shrugged his shoulders and smiled at everybody apologetically.

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OH SHIT!

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4 responses to “Bic Biro … View to a Quill … final annoying bit where the loose ends are all too conveniently tied up.

  1. Oh, that certainly wasn’t the worst ending ever! Actually, I rather enjoyed it. And an award is an award, after all. And if was of any help at all to Bic, then, well… that was my pleasure, I assure you 😉

  2. I thank you. Bic would thank you but seemingly he has been blown to smithereens. But I’m sure he will return to our screens one fine day. I love following your adventures as well. Tremendous fun! 😁 Kris.

  3. Oh, no! I am sure Bic has escaped. And with the help of GlueGun he was reassembled to enable him to solve writing crimes when least expected.

  4. Yes, he’ll be fine … what with the franchise and all.
    How delightful that you have dropped by.

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