Bic Biro is back in … ROLLERBALL!

Bic Biro is back in … ROLLERBALL!








It is late afternoon and Bic Biro, licensed to write, has been summoned to M’s office in the heart of MI6’s stationery department in London. Miss Olivetti, ‘M’s attractive secretary, looks up from her typing and smiles.

Hi Bic. Go on through. He’s expecting you. 

‘M’ is looking worried.


Biro07. I have an important assignment for you. The nation’s fate may well rest in your hands.

‘M’ ?

Our communications section has just received an email from BLOT. They have stolen an atomic bomb. They are threatening to launch the bomb at a major city in the United Kingdom unless we give them £20 billion  pounds and Kate Upton’s phone number.


So you want me to ring Kate and see if she’s up for it ?

You mean, you know Kate Upton !?

Well, we’ve certainly shared some quality time together.


Oh for heaven’s sake Biro07 !

And you also want me to save London ?

They haven’t mentioned London specifically.

So you don’t want me to save London ?

Shut up, Biro07 and listen!

Yes ‘M’

We have reliable intelligence that a BLOT sleeper agent has just started operating from a Chinese takeaway in Tooting. His name is Mr Wong. You need to pay him a visit and find out where the bomb is located and what the target is. I am sure I don’t have to remind you of the gravity of the situation. Do whatever it takes.


I may have to order a meal.

Whatever it takes, Biro07. To hell with the expense.

And if I find out that the target is NOT London … do you still want me to bother ?

Oh for God’s sake, Biro07. 

Just my little joke ‘M’. To relieve the tension. I’ll be off then.

Good luck Biro07. Britain is depending on you.

Thank you ‘M’. I’ll do my best.

And er … Biro07.

‘M’ ?

Could you just tell me Miss Upton’s phone number if you don’t mind. Just in case you don’t make it back.

Certainly ‘M’. It’s ….

… to be continued


13 responses to “Bic Biro is back in … ROLLERBALL!

  1. He’s back nice one Kri☺

  2. Bic is also currently in discussions over another remake of The Prisoner.

  3. He is not a number he is a free writing biro😂

  4. Bic! *swoon* I admit to being a little jealous of Kate Upton, but with a fellow as amazing as Bic, it’s only fair that all the best ladies… get to know him. But now all I can think of is sweet and sour balls. I may have to pay a visit to the Wong Brothers myself.

  5. I wasn’t expecting this kind of post. I surprised myself and enjoyed it. Good one.

  6. Pingback: Bic Biro in … ROLLERBALL (part 2) | Routine Matters

  7. I’m so happy to see Bic is back!

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